Monday, May 07, 2007

“... tintinnabulation that so musically wells ...

From the bells, bells, bells, bells, bells, bells, bells..."

You know, I'm usually a very up-beat person. Happy, energetic... bubbly even (no! really).
But lately I've had a problem with allergies and Tinnitus and it's driving me a little batty. There is a constant humming in my head and I can't breathe (congestion I mean). It's starting to affect my personality a little. I'm not grumpy or anything but feeling a little, well... blue. And this morning I woke up with my heart AND my mind racing. It was the closest I've EVER gotten to a anxiety attack. Me? Stressed? No Way! When have I ever been stressed? Well, okay... there was that period when I was leaving my spouse and getting a divorce... but NOT NOW! I'm the happiest I've ever been. And until the last few weeks, the healthiest I've ever felt. Thank you Pollen! Allergies SUCK!

Have you noticed how many people don't REALLY want to know "How are you?". Do you think they REALLY want you to tell them what you think of this "beautiful day, isn't it?"? Nope.

The first day or two when you say you're not feeling well it's all "OH, poor dear... is there anything I can do to help?" But let it go on for a week or so.... oh no! Then it's "Uh, huh... well, sorry to hear that ... I gotta run"

Am I being too sensitive? No, not really... just being observant I think.

And believe me, I have very good friends who worry about me and check on me and want to bring me "chicken soup" (or reasonable facsimilies there of). Then there are the ones... some really important ones... who for one reason or another cannot DEAL with the pain/discomfort of others. Maybe because they are in pain themselves and don't want to be reminded.

And then there are the ones that revel in the angst. I guess because...

But those "friends" are in a whole other category... and I'm too, uh, Up-beat to discuss them right now!


Lady Calliah said...

I do care. I'm sorry you're having a tough time and I hope it is over soon. *hugs*

peg said...

Thanks... I'm getting better!