Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Another track...

"No Air"
(Jordan Sparks feat. Chris Brown)

Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air

If I should die before I wake
It's 'cause you took my breath away
Losing you is like living in a world with no air

I'm here alone, didn't wanna leave
My heart won't move, it's incomplete
Wish there was a way that I can make you understand

But how do you expect meto live alone with just me
'Cause my world revolves around you
It's so hard for me to breathe


Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air
Can't live, can't breathe with no air
It's how I feel whenever you ain't there
It's no air, no air
Got me out here in the water so deep
Tell me how you gonna be without me
If you ain't here, I just can't breathe
It's no air, no air

No air, air

No air, air
No air, air
No air, air

I walked, I ran, I jumped, I flew

Right off the ground to float to you
There's no gravity to hold me down for real

But somehow I'm still alive inside

You took my breath, but I survived
I don't know how, but I don't even care

So how do you expect me

to live alone with just me
'Cause my world revolves around you
It's so hard for me to breathe


No air, air

No air, air
No air, air
No air, air
No more
It's no air, no air

[Chorus x2]

No air, air

No air, air
No air, air
No air, air

Sunday, March 23, 2008

soundtrack of my life...

for you, Love...

Hawkins Sophie B - Don't Don't Tell Me No lyrics

I never thought that I could
Crash upon your sandy shores
And like the feeling of your warm security
It's not like me

Now I come with strange excitement
At your very touch I'm frightened
Don't I ask too much you tell me
Long as I can keep on yelling

Don't don't tell me no
I want you to take my hand
Never ever let it go
Even if I make you mad
Darling every bit of love you give
You will get more back
If you believe it

Who cares if its forever
There's no time when we're together
Who cares if we don't worry
We don't even have to hurry

This is our world awaiting
For the sweetest penetrating
Love that we have found
Why can't we splatter it around and around

Why don't you stay
You make me laugh like it's forever
And cry like I have never
You heal my pain
Why can't we pray
Let's take the time to feel the weather
And love the world together
It's the only way

Song lyrics Don't Don't Tell Me No lyrics

you've had an effect on my life...

whether you planned it

my life changed because of you

i love you for that


have you ever watched Sex, Lies & Videotape?

oddly familiar to me ...

Friday, March 21, 2008

Goodbye, Arthur...

...I've loved you for as long as I can remember!

Arthur C. Clarke died on the morning of March 18, 2008 having completed "90 orbits around the sun". He had been suffering from breathing problems. (Wikipedia)

"If we have learned one thing from the history of invention and discovery, it is that, in the long run--and often in the short one--the most daring prophecies seem laughably conservative."

-Arthur C. Clarke

Bon Voyage, Sir Arthur!

Monday, March 17, 2008

Going thru the motions

Sleepwalking your days
no real feelings or deep thought
no motions for me.


sent from my iphone!

do you remember my number?

would you ever call?
if you just needed to talk
just needed a friend?

come back to us...

cannot entice you
nothing i have to offer
your heart is closed off

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

i like giants... i really do

very interesting!

check's in the mail...

job's done for today
is this your purpose in life?
purge my soul of joy?

Life is tests

This is a blog post from my friend T.J. He posted this on his MySpace page this morning.
Not only did I give him two Kudos... I thought it deserved to be re-posted. It's quite good, don't you think?

Some of you will discard this, based on its length... moving on to the next little survey on your page...
I like to test people all the time... Often times, when I ask something of somebody, or offer something, or behave a certain way, or even ask "are you sure"... I'm testing people... all of you.
Some pass... some fail. That is all relative to my personnal version of what is right , and what is wrong. We all have our own code... our own understanding of right and wrong, but I get something out of putting people through tests they don't even realize they are part of.
Some would say that's not very nice...
But you have to remember, that life IS tests!!
I will not say what my own personal yes, no, or "that was only once" responses are for each of these. I just want to say that in my opinion... life is tests...
Every reaction... every choice... is part of that.

When you find a quarter on the ground, do you shove it in your pocket... and forget about it? Or do you stick it in the next "Help the children" box you come across in the gas station?
When given an opportunity to show some trust in someone who has tried so hard to be deserving of it... do you deny it? Or do you give them the chance to prove their worth, despite your fears?
When you are given a twenty dollar bill, instead of the five you are supposed to recieve... do you smile to yourself about the error, and revel in your good fortune? Or do you hand the money back to the server, with the understanding, that that comes out of their pocket... and while you may have been sweet to them, at least SOMEBODY has recently treated them like shit!
When you have a choice of helping another through a patch in their life that may at times seem even trivial to you... do you point out your sufferings, and belittle what they go through? Or do you use your experience and knowledge, to assist them... knowing that you weren't always so worldly yourself?
When faced with a situation where someone who is supposed to be closed to you has a life altering experience... do you buckle under the pressure, and let your fear get the best of you? Or do you fight for, and with that person, knowing that they would always be the first to battle next to you, should anything ever come against you in your life?
When you see someone on the side of the road, struggling to change a tire... do you say "that sucks", and make sure you're on time for work? Or do you stop... help them... and go on late, get in trouble, and just hope that they will someday do the same for someone else?
When someone you know is really hard up... and you find yourself constantly helping them with bills, a ride, a shoulder, whatever the case may be... do you ask for favors from them? Do you remind them whenever possible, how generous you are, making sure to let others know of your apparent generosity? Or do you simply do what you can, and not tell others about it?
If a friend asks for a phone call, or message, or something so basic... just a few moments out of your time; to make sure you're okay. Do you make that a priority for that day? Or do you figure out what excuses you can use, because you don't feel like "dealing with them"?
If you're running late for an appointment, and you see someone struggling with a large container... or what WAS a large container full of items, now strewn on the floor. Do you help the almost certainly embarrassed individual pick up the mess? Or do you slide past, trying not to step on any of the contents... and rush to your appointment?
If you're in the checkout line at a store, with a half cart full of goods... and someone steps in behind you, carrying three items. Do you say "go ahead", and gesture in front of you? Or do you look back toward the convayor, and shovel your stuff toward the register?
If you have a child that finds that they have an interest in music or visual arts, and wants a way to express it... Do you support that part of their creative nature, and make certain that they have whatever means necessary... even if it means you don't get a better computer, or vacation, or a new appliance? Or do you tell the child to focus on something more "realistic", and ask them to be happy with whatever toys they've got?

Think about it... and remember... pass or fail, life IS tests.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

what pathology is this?

how can an organ,
a mass of muscle and blood
ache so completely?

Monday, March 10, 2008

What is Xibalba?

An absolute feast for the eyes! I will have to see this several more times to make real sense of it. I guess I will have to by the DVD, and read the book. It was spectacular. Very spiritual without being religious. It gave me shivers.
I've always loved Huge Jackman and still do! I'm more and more impressed with his acting ability.

It's pronounced (Shi bal ba)
From Wikipedia:

In Maya mythology Xibalba, roughly translated as "Place of fear",[1] is the name of the underworld, ruled by Mayan spirits of disease and death. In the 16th-century Verapaz, the entrance to Xibalba was traditionally held to be a cave in the vicinity of Cobán, Guatemala...

Xibalba is described in the Popol Vuh as a court below the
surface of the Earth. It is unclear if the inhabitants of Xibalba are the souls of the deceased or a separate race of beings worshipping death, but they are often depicted as being human-like in form. The place Xibalba was associated with death and was ruled by twelve gods or powerful rulers known as the Lords of Xibalba. The first among the Lords of Xibalba were One Death and Seven Death.

The remaining ten Lords are often referred to as demons and are given commission and domain over various forms of human suffering: to cause sickness, starvation, fear, destitution, pain, and ultimately death.[1] The remaining residents of Xibalba are thought to have fallen under the dominion of one of these Lords, going about the face of the Earth to carry out their listed duties.

Sunday, March 09, 2008

"I am Jaguar Paw...

... This is my forest. I am not afraid"

Didn't think I was going to like this one (certainly wasn't the chick flick I was looking for yesterday). I have to admit, I was captivated. Good Work, Mel!
Oh, and I love the poster.

Saturday, March 08, 2008

How'd I miss this one??

Made in 2004? I don't remember this one coming out at all. I really liked it. But then, I'm sitting here feeling really down and crying my eyes out at this chick flick... what the fuck's wrong with me??

Oh well, wonder what's coming on next... hmmm? Airport? Naw. Five Guns West? Definitely NOT! Geez, I need another 'tear jerker'! Any suggestions?? Anyone?? Help!

Friday, March 07, 2008

Charles Schultz philosophy... not...

it's a good philosophy though

(and it's been posted all over the place... and yes, I'm posting it again 'cause it's MY blog... wwahahahahahaha):

You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just read straight through, and you'll get the point.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America Contest.
4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.
5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.
6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.

How did you do?

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. They are not second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificate s are buried with their owners.

Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.
2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.
3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.
5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.

Easier? i love this!

The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are NOT the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards. They are the ones who care.

Share this with those who have made a difference in your life. I just did!

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today.
It's already tomorrow in Australia ."
(Charles Schultz)


According to Snopes, Only the last quote is actually Schultz'... but it's a wonderful sentiment don't ya think?

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Holy Mother of Perpetual Satisfaction...

well, Chocoholic Satisfaction anyway...

Have you tried these yet??

Oh My!

And Yes, "Oh My" is all I can come up with at the moment. I'm in Awe.

(And my keyboard is covered with little chocolate sprinkles sticking to chocolatey keys!)

Monday, March 03, 2008

Monday is "Data-dump" day...

(...or perhaps it's just "Information Overload")

My weekend was both wonderful and disappointing! Story of my life... (see Dichotomy entry), nothing is ever cut and dried in Peg's life. It's always "this and that", "either/or", "asi asi" but never just plain GOOD.

On Saturday, I spent the morning at the Clinic/Institute because the current 6 Month Massage Class was graduating and I wanted to help out. I feel somewhat responsible, although I really didn't have anything to do with THIS class. I do help out with the current 12 Month (evening) class and I've been tutoring one of the students in Anatomy & Physiology.
I've been offered a teaching position for the future! I will begin as a Teaching Assistant as I'm "groomed" to take over some of the classes, probably 2009 or so. It seems that Pam (owner/ Head Instructor) wants to have a LIFE... go figure.
I'm very excited about this!

After graduation, I stopped by the motorcycle range and visited with my Fwed for a little bit. We thrusted and parried... employing our usual ammunition: sexual innuendo! I SO enjoy our jousts! Then I headed to Starbucks to hang with my buddy grodge (AKA The Scholar). Haven't sat around 'bucks in quite a while... it was nice to have some down time. Later, he followed me over to my new digs and we watched a movie together.

In an attempt to help some of the students with class assignments that are... shall we say, Down to the Wire, I had made arrangements for a couple of them to come over on Sunday.
I was disappointed... yet again.
Funny how I'm always thinking I should DO what I say I will do... bad habit that!
I didn't leave the house in anticipation of these events... there WERE things I could have been doing. Not that I wanted to, mind you, but I could have. None the less, I guess I should thank them... in a way. Other than doing some laundry and vacuuming the floors (not a real task, as I have a Roomba) I relaxed and got some needed rest. I awoke this morning feeling nice and refreshed.

So, there was good and there was not-so-good this past weekend. Was there Bad, you ask (you did ask didn't you?)? Well, pervading my restful weekend, there was the fact that I had not heard from someone who is very important to me...

Letter to my love:

First, I want to say Thanks, Dear for responding this morning!

I have a really hard time not taking your silences personally.

I also have a hard time deciding whether I should tell you what I'm feeling. I think sometimes that it will make things worse and that it might make you more distant. I'm not sure if it makes things harder for you or if it makes you aware just how much I care for you.

I spent days leaving you alone, trying not to bother you, giving you "space". And it was agony, mostly because I spent it hoping that you would take the initiative and say something to me... call me, email me, whatever.
I didn't keep quiet to test you in any way, I just thought perhaps you needed me to leave you alone... but I wanted to feel missed. In the end, I did what I always do... contact YOU.

I felt guilty because I've been thinking of myself... I DO get to think of myself some don't I?? I spend so much time thinking of others... I wanted something for me. I wanted YOU.

I foresee it getting even harder... as my time gets taken up even more with duties and clients.
And I see you getting mired more and more in your... tasks, your chores... your withdrawal!
I'm frightened that you will get to a point where you won't even want to TRY anymore... try to see me... or anyone else for that matter. Will you stop wanting me? I'm scared that you already have.